Here are the highlights from Friday’s Headlines on Dennis & Callahan with Kirk Minihane, John Dennis and Gerry Callahan. To hear the segment, go to the Dennis & Callahan audio on demand page.

– A week after suffering cardiac arrest during surgery, comedian Joan Rivers died at the age of 81 on Thursday. Whether she was doing stand-up comedy or appearing on a late night TV show, she provided brutally honest humor.

Said Minihane: “I was always a Joan Rivers fan. I listened to Howard Stern a lot growing up — when you guys were on commercial break. She would be on, and I would enjoy her. I tweeted out yesterday that she was a top-five non-weird guest on Stern.”

Replied Dennis: “I hate to use this term, it’s like a military term. It should be bigger than this. But in a comedic sense, she was brave.”

Callahan didn’t seem to think that Rivers would be successful if she started her comedy act in today’s age.

“What if she were just starting today? She wouldn’t make it out of Giggles [comedy club]. She would not make it on TV, she would not make it on radio.”

Callahan jokingly wondered who would get custody of Rivers’ daughter, Melissa, because her father took his own life many years ago. Rivers, who occasionally filled in for Johnny Carson as host of “The Tonight Show,” in 1986 accepted an offer to host a late night show on Fox, for which her husband, Edgar Rosenberg, was a producer. The show failed, and Rivers’ husband took it very hard.

Said Minihane: “The show fails spectacularly, the husband is an executive producer of the show. He was so upset with the failure of the show that he committed suicide.”

– After this week’s nude photo hacking scandal, Cosmopolitan conducted a survey, for which 99 percent of the respondents were female at an average age of 21. Of the people responding, 89 percent said they had taken at least one naked picture of themselves and only 14 percent regretted doing it.

Minhane wondered if Callahan would send a naked selfie if he was dating a younger girl today.

Callahan: “I couldn’t do it. Any guy’s body is disgusting. Yours, mine.”

– To keep “Today” show host Matt Lauer happy, NBC has agreed to pay for his helicopter trips to and from home in the Hamptons on Long Island. NBC said it allows Lauer to spend more time with his family.

Said Callahan: “If this were someone who was just amazingly talented, if it were Penn [Jillette], from Penn and Teller — but it’s Matt Lauer. If he weren’t there, who would be his backup? Josh Elliott. If this were some other talking head, would it matter?”

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Andrew Battifarano

Here are the highlights from Thursday’s Three for All on Middays with MFB with Lou Merloni, Christian Fauria and Tim Benz. To hear the segment, go to the MFB audio on demand page.

– Benz opened the segment by complaining about the crowds he encountered over Labor Day weekend mainly due to the return of the college students.

Not only has the time of his drive into work become substantially longer, his trip to the department store was a nightmare.

“When we got done with our short show [on Monday] and I said, ‘I’ve got some errands to do, I’ve got to go to Target and pick up a few things.’ Dumbest thing I’ve ever done in my life. It was like the mall on Black Friday. It was every sorority girl, their dorm mate and their moms.”

Added Benz: “It was a zoo. I’ve never seen anything like this. It literally was Black Friday at the mall. People ramming each other with their carts. You could go in the home interior section. It was chaos.”

– Impressionist Frank Caliendo delivered a memorable performance with his imitation of Morgan Freeman reciting Allen Iverson‘s legendary “We talkin’ ’bout practice” diatribe.

Benz recalled Caliendo seeing read the Dunkin’ Donuts menu as Morgan Freeman.

“Everything better with Morgan Freeman,” Fauria said.

“That’s his go-to impersonation now,” Benz said. “Morgan Freeman, all the time.”

– Olympic track star Lolo Jones was announced as the latest athlete who will compete on “Dancing with the Stars.”

Fauria noted that athletes don’t always make great dancers.

“You would think they would have some sort of rhythm. Like, you’re an athlete, just naturally you’d think that would go hand in hand,” Fauria said. “It doesn’t necessarily go that way.”

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Red Sox asst. GM Mike Hazen on the state of the Sox.
The top stories of the day as recounted by Kirk Minihane.
The guys opened the show by discussing yesterday's Brady presser.

Here are the highlights from Thursday’s Headlines on Dennis & Callahan with Kirk Minihane, John Dennis and Gerry Callahan. To hear the segment, go to the Dennis & Callahan audio on demand page.

– During Wednesday night’s debate among Massachusetts Democratic gubernatorial candidates, the topic of Boston hosting the Olympics was introduced.

Favorite Martha Coakley said, “I think we should. I think that it gives us an opportunity to invest in infrastructure now that will go beyond the Olympics if we do it right.”

Dennis sighed and said: “The Boston Olympics is the single dumbest idea I have heard in my life.”

Added Callahan: “We need less infrastructure. There are traffic jams everywhere now. The only one making out on this deal is the guy who rents the friggin’ orange barrels. … She’s wrong, we don’t need more infrastructure, and we sure as hell don’t need the Olympics.”

The candidates were asked if they support the death penalty for accused Boston Marathon bombing suspect Dzokhar Tsarnaev. All the candidates voiced clear opposition to the death penalty in any case.

“That’s pathetic,” Callahan said. “These three moonbats think Dzokhar deserves to live happily ever after.”

– “Fancy” is the No. 1 song of the summer according to Billboard magazine, but none of the hosts are familiar with the Iggy Azalea tune.

“If they did the top 10 songs in America right now, would you know any of them?” Minihane wondered.

“No,” Callahan responded.

The hosts then transitioned into a discussion of the best groups whose names are only letters and/or numbers.

Among the favorites: U2, R.E.M. and, by default, according to Callahan, the B-52s.

Callahan also wanted to include ELO, but Minihane protested that the actual group name is Electric Light Orchestra. Callahan tried to make a similar argument against the inclusion of INXS.

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Cyd discussed Michael Sam's likely signing with the Cowboys and how he has been treated by the media.
The top stories of the day as recounted by Kirk Minihane.
The guys opened the show by discussing Wes Welker's suspension for use of amphetamines.

Here are the highlights from Wednesday’s Headlines on Dennis & Callahan with Kirk Minihane, John Dennis and Gerry Callahan. To hear the segment, go to the Dennis & Callahan audio on demand page.

A second American reporter was beheaded in a video released by ISIS militants Tuesday. Steven Sotloff, a Florida native who went to high school at Kimball Union Academy in New Hampshire, was freelancing for Time and other publications before being captured in Syria a year ago.

This led to criticism of the manner in which President Barack Obama is handling the situation.

“The real good news is that Obama got up and down on 14, short-sided himself and made that shot,” Minihane said.

Callahan noted that information about presidents’ golf games in the past has been well known, but Obama has been secretive about his performance on the links.

“We hear all about Obama playing golf, 193 rounds now since he’s been in office, do you know anything about his golf game?” Callahan said. “Do you know his handicap? ‘€¦ We know nothing about Obama’s golf game except that he plays in the middle of the worst crises the world is having. Wouldn’t you like to know? I know they’re not going to report it if he cheats, but wouldn’t you like to know if he’s any good?”

Replied Minihane: “I don’t really care.”

Said Dennis: “A texter makes a good point: If Obama were really, really good at golf, we’d know all about it.”

– Three men were arrested a weeding reception on a boat in Pittsburgh early Monday morning after a brawl broke out, apparently instigated when the groom behaved inappropriately with a waitress.

According to KDKA, 33-year-old Mark Williams touched the waitress and tried to pour alcohol down her throat even after she told him she was pregnant. When the boat returned to the dock, the woman’s boyfriend confronted the groom and a brawl ensued. Williams, his brother — who is a Pennsylvania State Trooper — and another man in the wedding party were arrested and face various charges.

“As you know, John, if you’ve had a couple of drinks and a pregnant girl walks by, you can’t keep your hands off her. That is your fetish,” Minihane said, adding to Dennis: “This was at a wedding, on the cruise at the reception, he had some drinks, got into an argument with his wife of a few hours and then grabbed a pregnant waitress, and then it all started — which I assumed was going to happen at your wedding. I was disappointed. It was low key.”

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