This went viral over the weekend and is up to over a half million hits. Ordinarily I can live without cutesy, gimmicky wedding bits, but this won me over. One of the greatest bad songs ever recorded. The Made of Honor’s adorable accent. The almost perfect execution. Then add to all of it that her name is Rachel Winterbottom? That’s the stuff that makes it Afternoon Delight-worthy.

@JerryThornton1

Blog Author: 
Jerry Thornton

 

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There’s your beloved sweetheart, America. Taking what for every other football player with a shred of respect for the game is the fulfillment of a childhood dream, and turning into an infomercial. This is your Peyton Manning. The guy the whole country has worshiped and glorified for 20 years, boiled down to his essence and exposed for the shameless, product-hawking shill he truly is.

And I couldn’t be happier. I’ve taken some grief over the years for bashing this guy. I’ve been questioned about how I could possibly hate such a genuine, likable, aw-shucks, everyman. And here it is in a nutshell. This is the perfect microcosm of what a mealy-mouthed, snotbag little rich kid he is. The ultimate example of a guy who was born at third base and thinks he hit a triple. And that whole “regular guy” thing is a total fabrication of his corporate handlers. The truth is he’s a shameless greed head with zero reservations about turning what should be the punctuation mark at the end of a Hall of Fame career into a chance to make a quick buck.

And don’t “but he didn’t get paid by Budweiser” me. He not only owns Bud distributorships, the second he’s formally retired he’ll be humping it more than the love child of Budman and Spuds McKenzie. He’s Ricky Bobby, only without the prayer:

…Though I have no doubt he’d sell a commercial break into one of the price is right.

Although I’ve said it many times, many ways, I have no choice but to ask again. What would the country say if Tom Brady had pulled this? You can have Peyton Manning, his two rings and the billboard he’ll no doubt turn his massive, HGH-created fivehead into. I’ll stick with the guy who wins and loses with class.

@JerryThornton1

Blog Author: 
Jerry Thornton

 

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How did Brent Musburger put it when he made the cat call that launched Katherine Webb into superstardom? “I’€™m telling you, you quarterbacks, you get all the good looking women.” And of course he was correct. But then again, there’s your garden variety Quarterback Girlfriend Hotness, then there’s Three-Time Super Bowl MVP Quarterback Hotness, which is a different level altogether. Only two men have ever achieved that height, and only two QBs can claim to have wives like Gisele and Jennifer Montana.

And this photo illustrates Musburger’s creepy, leering but totally understandable point. This is why the best of the best aspire to greatness. This is why they pay the price. This is why the clock in Brady’s gym is already counting down to Super bowl 51. So that when he’s his boyhood hero’s age, he’ll also be running with arm candy of Jennifer Montana quality.

As a final note, if I could trade places with anyone in this picture, is it weird that I’d most want to be Gisele?

@JerryThornton1

Blog Author: 
Jerry Thornton
NFL commissioner Roger Goodell held a press conference during Super Bowl week where he answered mostly staged questions. Tom E. Curran actually got to ask a real question about the new PSI testing data, but Goodell didn't bother to answer him.
Aqib Talib, fresh off a Super Bowl win, had some fun with the NFL Network crew, falling on their stage. Also, the guys take calls and break down more of the Super Bowl.
Once again, and on the biggest stage, Mike Carey was wrong about a coach's challenge. Glenn, Lou and Christian rip Carey and talk about how he was never heard from again.

[0:01:29] ... here and what we got to rule. Unless we miss something most Cam Newton was really brilliant and really good that post game press conference was not an embarrassing moment for him. Arm then how do you how was that the commentary post game. We you're defending Cam Newton Cam Newton was the MVP of the season it was on cam new is out. It was his duty to go up there and ...
[0:02:40] ... Yeah I don't know I don't wanna I'm sure noticeable need the Super Bowl opponent last year the brutal march would have brutal martian. And the Nicole today and not identical it and not to do ...
[0:03:34] ... the beginning right. And that might carry it looked like I was Carolina Panthers receiver here Cotchery caught with a Cotchery. Caught up all that around. I thought he caught it's like up Mike Terry we have a joint. But I think that he called it right except I did too. So what might carry an accident he's going to be wrong with the but it didn't matter what her chair. Edward under the test until I like Terry's. It. Ruling on the field incomplete pass let's bring in Mike Carey who was the referee a Super Bowl 42 what do you see here might I think good good good challenge by Carolina. The receiver goes out he's going to ...
[0:08:36] ... we're gonna get right back to you focus really get it to Tom Brady. Wasn't nice Tom. Flew all the way out there the senate Claire to get recognized by the the 70000 in attendance will ...






To the surprise of some, Tom Brady showed up to the Super Bowl 50 MVP ceremony, and the fans in the stadium booed the 3-time Super Bowl MVP.
The guys give their Super Bowl reactions after the Broncos beat the Panthers, and Glenn, Lou and Christian rip Cam Newton for being a baby and a sore loser with the media.

This year’s Super Bowl ads, like the game itself, were a crushing disappointment for the most part.

The once proud American institution continued its steady decline of recent years, either falling back on tired, shopworn cliches or trying so hard to be edgy that they just came off as desperate and weird. Still, while it wasn’t the best year, there were a few bright spots. Having compiled the data from an exhaustive, highly scientific survey (I asked the friends I had over to grade them on a scale of one to 10), here are the top five best and worst ads of the night:

The Best:

T-Mobile’s “Drop the Balls”

Sure, this was utterly predictable given that celebrity-shaming is a Super Bowl ad tradition unlike any other. But Steve Harvey earned the humiliation.Budweiser’s “Drink Responsibly”

I’m just going to come right out and say it: Helen Mirren is hot.

Doritos’ “Ultra Sound”

Simply put, the funniest one of the night.

Amazon’s “Baldwin Bowl”

They had me at Alec Baldwin. There is simply no one on TV better at playing off his own exaggerated pomposity than him.

Avocados from Mexico’s “AVOS in Space”

Avocados are on a roll, following up last year’s NFL draft parody with this. And Scott Baio takes home the coveted “Has Been Celebrity Willing to Humiliate Himself” award.

The Worst:

Xifaxan’s “Talking Intestines”

What part of the digestive system do you think that mouth is, exactly? Hint: You don’t want to kiss this thing on the lips.

NFL’s “Super Bowl Babies”

As I said when this one dropped last week, I’m a grown man and I refuse to accept the circumstances by which my parents conceived me. How does the NFL think 8-and 9-year olds should be singing about it?

Opioid-Induced Constipation’s “Envy”

I’ve just spent the day horking down chips, meatballs and chili. The last thing I need to hear about is this guy’s plumbing being backed up.

Jublia’s “Fight It”

Irritable bowels, constipation and toenail fungus? Was this a Super Bowl or a MeTV daytime marathon of “Murder She Wrote”?

Mountain Dew’s “Puppymonkeybaby”

Granted, it wasn’t that sick insurance company one last year with the kid talking about being dead. But this was an advertiser trying way too hard to be clever. Don Draper would have killed this one at the pitch stage. But in 2016, this is what makes it all the way to the Super Bowl. I weep for my country.

@JerryThornton1

Blog Author: 
Jerry Thornton
The top stories of the day as recounted by Kirk Minihane.

[0:01:31] ... ruby. And let's dispel once and for all of this fiction that Barack Obama doesn't know what he's doing he knows exactly what he's doing. Let's dispel what this fiction that Barack Obama doesn't know what he's doing. He knows exactly what he's doing and this notion of Barack Obama doesn't know what he's doing is just not there is he knows that there is looking to memorize like five seconds speed. We are not facing a president that doesn't know what he's doing he knows what he's doing. Anyone who believes that Barack Obama isn't doing what he's doing on purpose doesn't understand what we're dealing with here. What's the I would come out. Bought real ...
[0:02:24] ... view and you get past disasters rain of this move in the White House. A leash he's focused on the right kind of give rubio that he's focused on Obama. Pebble when you say first things ...
[0:03:32] ... were gonna Wear your ass off but it can kick out. Meet John Kerry Wood so be senator now. Well there's look at senator Sanders trip fewer accomplishments and rubio in the senate. But it doesn't matter in these and is not to worry about because his followers are all going. Struck the Super Bowl last night you know there was there was try to give or be shows a big form it yes it year after ...
[0:04:17] ... I'm grateful you're still here it is an honor. To follow the Super Bowl especially super bull fifty. If that's a milestone yet right is now all the Super Bowl gets to join ARP that. Everything because we are broadcasting ally tonight. Could do anything. CBS has a team of lawyers standing ...