So while you were kicking back Sunday, enjoying a terrible football game, watching a subpar selection of ads and waiting for Peyton Manning to shamelessly whore himself out to major pizza and beer conglomerates, this is what feminist group NARAL was doing. Watching every commercial through the context of how it destroys the cause of female equality. And as you can see from these tweets, it took some major squinting to even see the ads through a worldview this narrow.
To review: Portraying a hungry, cranky Marilyn Monroe as William Dafoe is damaging to transgendered people. If you suggest an unborn baby likes Doritos, you’re being anti-choice. Mashing up the Odell Beckham Jr. catch with the common, traditional practice of catching a wedding bouquet is demeaning to women. And the mere suggestion grown women get sexually aroused by Ryan Reynolds is hate speech.
This is just further proof, as if we needed it, that no one can hurt a cause more than someone who supports it but is an idiot and a zealot about it. I don’t care where you fall on the issue, there’s not one woman in America who’s going to be denied an abortion because a cartoon fetus in a Super Bowl ad jumped out of its mother’s birth canal to go after some orange, triangular snack treats. And that legitimately funny spot no more “humanizes” fetuses than the Mountain Dew ad “humanizes” puppymonkeybabies.
But in an odd way, as delusional and misguided at the people who tweeted this nonsense out are, I sort of envy them. It must be easier to go through life as the self-appointed Fun Police. To evaluate everything you see, hear, touch, smell and taste not by whether it appeals to you or not, but by how much it offends you. To give up any pretense of whether anything is enjoyable and just focus on the extent to which it furthers your particular cause. I’d think that would be liberating. And a much simpler path to take through life as opposed to being entertained and trying to entertain others. I mean, sure, you run the risk of overreaching, looking ridiculous and setting your cause back decades. But I suppose that just gives you more to be offended about.
Then again, maybe I’m just being a clueless dad.