ESPN — NFL commissioner Roger Goodell reiterated Friday morning on ESPN Radio that he is still willing to consider changes to some areas of the discipline policy but nothing that involves what he classifies under integrity of the game. “I am not going to hand off the integrity of the NFL to somebody who does not understand our business,” Goodell said on ESPN’s Mike & Mike. …
Goodell said he would “of course” pick up the phone if one a representative of New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady called to discuss a settlement to an ongoing appeal of his four-game suspension in the Deflategate matter. But he gave no indication he would consider a reduction. “We had a lot of discussions last summer,” he said. “There were a lot of offers back and forth about what to do to settle the issue. They chose to pursue the issue and we chose to move forward and we are where we are.”
God help me. How long is this Roger Goodell Victory Tour going to last? Seriously, how long am I going to have to tolerate this soulless, masochistic, tedious little despot Gronk-spiking the legal football in all our faces? When he was getting his junk kicked in the dirt by judges, you couldn’t find the man with bloodhounds and an army of volunteers searching the area for clues. Now the most dangerous place in the world is between the CommissionerBot and a microphone.
I mean, listen to that smug tone in the Chris Berman video. If you can stand it. Because is so painful to endure, it could be used as a tribal rite of passage to prove you’ve entered into adulthood. And to the surprise of no one who’s been paying attention, he manages to spin it like the Second Circuit Court judges were saying Tom Brady and Dorito Dink are guilty, instead of what they did say, which is he has a ridiculous amount of power he can abuse without discretion or fairness. And let’s not have anyone kid themselves into thinking he’s willing to talk about a resolution. He’s willing to have Brady crawl in on his belly, admit he’s guilty and beg for mercy. And then he’d throw Article 46 at him and say, “See? I was right all along.” No deal.
I’m in such a blind rage over Goodell and his smarmy insufferability that I’m losing the capacity to form words. So I’ll do what I always do when I can’t write: Steal from a better writer. In this case, Shakespeare. From “The Merchant of Venice”:
He hath disgraced me. And hindered me. Half a million have laughed at my losses, mocked at my gains, scorned my nation, thwarted my bargains, cooled my friends, heated mine enemies. And what’s his reason? I am a Patriots fan. The villany you teach me, I will execute. And it shall go hard but I will better the instruction.
As I said earlier in the week, I’ve had enough of Goodell’s transparency. Now I’m ready to go back to his days of invisibility.
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