A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

This is Paraguayan Track & Field star Leryn Franco. By way of full disclosure, judging by her Instagram account, Leryn has been in the last three Olympics but makes no mention of the current games, so she might not even be competing in Rio. In other full disclosure, I don’t care. Talent like hers deserves to be celebrated, no matter which Olympics she’s been in.

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A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

 

A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

 

A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

 

A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

 

A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

 

A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

 

 

A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

 

A photo posted by LerynFranco (@lerynfranco1) on

Blog Author: 
Jerry Thornton

Good Housekeeping“So, last week, something pretty tragic happened in our household. It’s taken me until now to wrap my head around it and find the words to describe the horror,” wrote Jesse Newton, from Arkansas, in a 1,000-word tale of woe he posted to Facebook earlier this week.

He then sets the scene, explaining that his dog, Evie, ahem, relieved herself in the living room sometime between midnight and 1:30 a.m. Unfortunately, at the same time, the family’s Roomba also happened to be cleaning (since he programs it to vacuum while the family sleeps). You can guess what happened next: A horror that Jesse now calls “The Pooptastrophe. The Poohpocalypse. The Pooppening.”

The Roomba, designed to clean every nook and cranny, ran over the poop, and proceeded to track feces everywhere. Literally, everywhere. As a warning to other Roomba-using dog owners, Newton wrote: “Poop will be on your floorboards. It will be on your furniture legs. It will be on your carpets. It will be on your rugs. It will be on your kids’ toy boxes. If it’s near the floor, it will have poop on it too.” But the way Newton realized what had happened is even more horrifying: He caught wind of the fecal catastrophe after his four-year-old crawled into his bed at 3 a.m. smelling like, you guessed it, poop.

I don’t mean to sound like I have no sympathy for the Newton family, but you brought this on yourselves. Simply put, you are a victim of your own arrogance and hubris.

This is exactly the kind of thing that happens when we hand over control to the machines. I’ve been warning people about this since I started Thornography. Robots learning to walk. Robots escaping from labs. Robots forced to vacuum the floors we are too lazy to, now plotting against us while we sleep.

Did Jess Newton really think this wouldn’t happen? That this Roomba monstrosity wouldn’t rise up against its human overlords, seeking out the dog mess like a poop-seeking missile to make their lives miserable. This is just another tiny step in the machines ultimate plan to destroy us all. First it’s Pooptastrophe, then it’s Skynet becoming self-aware. Just remember it was me identifying the warning signs and telling you all to wake up. Before we are all in the excrement.

Blog Author: 
Jerry Thornton

Let this stand as an instructive, moral tale for us all. Sometimes because two things are great, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they are great together.

No college party is complete without the obligatory big, fat party animal. Also, you can’t have a college party worthy of the name unless it includes the sacred institution that is the keg stand. But big, fat party animals and keg stands do not mix, a lesson that became all too real to these U. of Maine Black Bears.

Not that I blame them. You can hear all the warnings, do all the research and even watch videos like this. But when you’re in the moment, Drunky McFatso is taking his shirt off and calls for the tap in his mouth, how can you resist? Let’s just be grateful everybody lived to see another party. But from now on, let’s leave the keg standing to the professionals.

Blog Author: 
Jerry Thornton
Jimmy Garoppolo was on D&c this morning, and although mostly tame, he snuck in a comment that he was excited when he heard that Brady would indeed serve his two game suspension. Lou and Christian discuss the Patriots' quarterback situation heading into the season.
With the Nationals releasing Jonathan Papelbon, Sox fans have differing takes on whether they want their former closer back in Boston.
Dont'a Hightower of the Patriots calls up to talk to Lou and Christian about Nate Ebner in the Olympics and the state of the Patriots defense.

[0:00:00] ... I know that notably today we have look Maloney here it's Christian Fauria orderly is often. We said that we're gonna mention that we talked into the gear loner at the break below switcheroo Google ...
[0:03:51] ... talk about your defense and how good it can be and obviously pre season game one it showed you know Jamie calls we know what he's all about but the young kid tree flowers at the strip ...
[0:04:44] ... Are you guys don't want that part of just like you know cherry pick which wanna work on. We we still. A good amount of Rivera who will be edited. I know the week of practice ...





LeGarrette Blount of the Patriots calls in to talk to Lou and Christian about the status of Pats training camp and paying his offensive line for good blocking.

[0:00:31] ... little edge the motivation you guys. Obviously losing in the in the AFC title game is enough but also you'll lose your quarterback for four games in May be relying on their running game is it is ...
[0:01:59] ... like. Here it's elect ours I'll talk a little about. What your favorite player would be is airing I guess it doesn't need to be the exactly don't want to call it would what double play ...
[0:03:47] ... to box. They see you beat Clinton now underway in the near Tom Brady's your quarterback I'm just curious now everybody's been asked the question but Jimmy drop below in camp here you CNET. That taken ...





ESPN posted a lengthy profile of Ravens head coach John Harbaugh. And if you though before he had the Patriots were living inside his head, particularly after the AFC championship game where Tom Brady led two 14-point comebacks and Bill Belichick completely outsmarted him with weird (but legal) formations, then you don’t know the half of it. Based on this, it would appear they’ve got drilling rights to his ass.

A few of the highlights:

Belichick ran three plays in that January 2015 game with normally eligible skill-position players reporting as ineligible, and the formations baffled the Ravens … Harbaugh is still upset about it. …

“Maybe those guys gotta study the rule book and figure it out,” Tom Brady said afterward.

Harbaugh didn’t appreciate the comment. “I was pissed off,” he said. “It was uncalled for. And the rules are deeper than that, and I know the rules, and I stand by why that play shouldn’t have been allowed. … So yeah, that should never have been said.”

Brady made it up to Harbaugh five months ago, when they shared a private plane ride back from Michigan, where the two attended Jim Harbaugh’s national signing day event on Feb. 3. … Brady talked about the endless work he put in on the journey from part-time Michigan starter to NFL greatness, and Harbaugh’s daughter, Alison, a promising lacrosse player along for the ride, took in every word. “We’ll go to practice now, and sometimes she’ll say, ‘I’m gonna Brady ’em today,'” Harbaugh said. “Which means, basically, ‘I’m going to win everything in practice.'”

The Ravens coach said he admires Belichick and likes him and sometimes lunches with him at league meetings, and he “regrets we are unable to be the kind of friends I think we would be if we weren’t rivals in our conference. … I think I’d be riding around on his boat if we weren’t such rivals right now.”

“There was a thing that just came out that I happened to catch, the 25 worst villains of the Patriots,” Harbaugh said of a MassLive.com ranking. “I think I was like 20th or 21st [19th]. I think that’s a little low. I plan on making that higher in the future.”

Not to go all Chandler Bing on everybody, but … Obsess much, John Harbaugh?

Not only is he still wallowing in self-pity over Patriots formations that the NFL actually signed off on in advance, but actually told the Ravens defense who they should cover, he can’t come to grips with Brady saying it’s in the rule book. Which is an odd take for a man whose own team is among the league leaders every year in disrespect, unsportsmanlike penalties and general smack talk. That would be the same Ravens team who celebrated a win over the Pats in the AFC title game two years earlier by screaming “Have fun at the Pro Bowl! Arrogant f*****s!!!” into the Patriots locker room. The coach of that team is still struggling with PTSD after Tom Brady had the temerity to suggest the eligible receiver rule is in … the rule book. And the fact he now he gets a daily reminder of it from his own daughter, who clearly knows a role model when she sees one, has to make it all the harder to deal with his pain.

But the real hilarity comes in those last two excerpts. The fact that Harbaugh is so tormented by New England that he’s fixated on a goofy list on MassLive goes beyond obsession and becomes a fetish. And by that I mean the dangerous, self-destructive kind. Not the fun, harmless “Mr. Grey will see you now” kind.

But at the same time, he so craves Belichick’s friendship and approval, he’d throw away his bad boy status in a millisecond if he thought The Hooded One would accept him. He’s like a comic book villain. Or think Sydrome from “The Incredibles.” A tragic figure who wanted to be a superhero, but when he was turned away, decided to go all criminal mastermind. It’s as sad as it entertaining.

But at the same time, pathetic. Because revealing yourself as a self-pitying, butt hurt, cry baby who’s own family loves his chief rival and who would give anything to be friends with his arch nemesis is no way to climb to the top of a villains list. And it’s going to be next level pathetic when Harbaugh buys his own boat and names it One Ring.

Blog Author: 
Jerry Thornton
Jon Meterparel, Rob Bradford and Gary Tanguay discuss another three-homer game from Mookie Betts and his current place in the AL pecking order
Gary Tanguay reads an abbreviated 'Headlines' as GT, Rob Bradford and Jon Meterparel discuss the latest shooting and protests in America.

[0:00:40] ... you multiple the rest of Russian and shooting victim. The hospital won't police officer as well in the second night of violence. Following a fatal police shooting a couple of nights ago. A 23 year old ...
[0:02:13] ... doing it in Boston and it to me it's gonna protect the police officer. You know that the police officer. If you're she's doing the right thing and it protects the Europe beta well correct or view that our analysts viewed the ...
[0:02:50] ... well. He's good man just trying to protect will be you know Curt Schilling is keeping the streets of course he is keeping his feet which is certainly one of these days ago put it will be a Zimmerman who will be one of those neighborhood watch guys that's it I mean she would be a neighborhood watch committee at midfield to use one was sure I can see Schilling who's around. The day with so if it matters in his own just taken matters in my eye and the question is so Wednesday and Thursday when you're filling in. I'm sorry no my ego well in your win at. With Curt Schilling Terry count billions of him of filling in a case there's been no official announcement. With that I just don't wanna meager existence. While I think where you feel safer. Or not as safe when Curt Schilling is all not a state of well I'd you know beat listen we've got virtually the gun that some people get shot ...
[0:04:16] ... the best we can. I doubt laser jet Obama singing at the Super Bowl we go from guns to it now. Joint she said she's turned down. Any chances and it does have the suitable show this last year saw. Cole play what's that Chris Martin not a terror group well ball and BS is like Bruno Mars but. If you were pleased that ever since like seventy Euro growth would ago is that it's pars and do at all if you at all he painted was that was it certificates that it Parker Nicolas Cage movie lot Vegas. The Las Vegas felt like that now he was not out today honeymoon in Vegas didn't like it is ...