I have no idea if the Patriots want Michael Vick.

You hear things, read things. Maybe they want to get into the Wildcat sweepstakes. Maybe they think Tom Brady isn’t completely healthy and don’t think there is a Cassell II in the wings. Corey Dillon and Randy Moss turned out OK, right? And if it worked with them…

(Patriot Place almost sounds like it could be a reform home for lost NFL souls, doesn’t it? Or is it more like a faceless, joyless piece of land where you can wait three hours to eat a $25 dollar plate of mac and cheese before spending another 12 bucks to watch “The Proposal”?)

I’d be stunned, frankly, if Vick wound up here. I don’t see it. But every time a list of five or six potential destinations pop up the Pats always seem to be on it. Something about smoke and fire is kicking around in my head. And if it ever did happen? I think it would be the most controversial move in Boston sports history, I really do. You’d have weeks of editorials and boycotts and protests and there would, I think, be a 60 percent chance of Gerry Callahan literally spontaneously combusting during an on-air battle with a pro-Vick caller.

(Maybe this is where I can gleefully bash Tony Dungy. At what point during his meeting with Vick on May 5th did St. Tony advise Mike to hit up a strip club during his first night out of the clink? Big impact, Tony. Well done. I’m sure he’s a swell guy and all but I’m done with Dungy’s act. And he is going to FLOP on the NBC pregame show. Let’s see, bland personality AND won’t be critical? Wow, must hire. And I’m on the record that Rodney Harrison will be, within two years, the best pregame analyst in sports. Doesn’t care what anyone thinks and is smart as a whip, which is EXACTLY what is needed to stand out in that role.)

But if Bill Belichick thinks they should sign Michael Vick? Then they should sign Michael Vick.

In 2005 I saw Bob Dylan in concert for the first time. I had been warned that Bob had lost his fastball, but that did not prepare me for an hour-and-a-half set that bordered on the insane. I’m about a 12-handicap when it comes to Dylan music, and I did not understand a single word he was singing the entire time. And he does this on purpose. It’s almost as if he wants zero fun to occur during the show. (Also, he never spoke to the crowd, not a single word. Look, I’m not asking for Jimmy Buffet-style antics, but be a human being, at least).

Walking back to the car after the show (it was at Dodd Stadium in Norwich, CT -- pretty good place for a show, actually), I was more than a little disappointed. I mean, this was Bob Dylan. If there is an Ali of music, it is Mr. Robert Zimmerman, no arguments allowed. And I just watched him perform the musical equivalent of losing to Trevor Berbick.

My friend Jim was at the show with me and seemed OK with the whole thing, which surprised me because, a) it was also his first Dylan show, and, b) he is a BIG fan. (Well, as big a fan as one can be while waiting 30 years to see him in concert.) I asked him why he wasn’t crushed.

“Well, he’s Bob Dylan. He’s done enough. If he wants to stand on that stage and basically say f—k you to us for two hours he’s earned that right.”

Perfect. And, of course, that is exactly where Belichick is at this point. House money the rest of the way. 


Again, if I had to guess I’d put it at 100-1, but let’s assume for a moment that the Patriots sign Vick. Dollars to donuts the first question BB gets at the press conference probably won’t be his thoughts on the Academy Awards expanding to 10 Best Picture nominees (though I’ve been told he’s outraged). It’ll simply be this:

“Why?”

And this is the answer he should give:

“Well, he makes us a better football team. We had a need and he’s here to fill it, we hope. What he did was wrong, of course, and guess what? He served his time and paid his debt. Wasn’t up to me if it should have been longer or shorter. Same with his suspension. Commissioner Goodell felt six games was right, we support that decision 100 percent. Michael is a grown man who made some hideous errors in judgment. Well, if he continues down that path he’ll be gone. It’s really up to him now. And, yes, I get that I’m not everyone’s favorite and bringing in this guy is only going to give those more fodder to act morally superior once again. But I don’t care. If we don’t sign him someone will. My job is to put the best football team on the field, plain and simple. I’m not in the business of making moral stands while watching other teams get better. And I’m pretty good at it, by the way. That’s why I have five Super Bowl rings and everyone else in the room has a combined total of zero. Sorry, Steve Burton, that replica you bought doesn’t count. Oh, and does anyone think more than, what, ten season tickets will be cancelled over this? No shot in hell.

“Any other questions?”

Of course, this would most likely be the answer:

“Makes us a better football team.”

I understand that Michael Vick will be hired to do the audio recording for “Marley and Me, Part 2” before he’s on the Patriots. We all know that, and it’s fine. In a world where Seneca Wallace and Dan Orlovksy get starts under center there is probably a home for Vick as a starting QB, or starter in waiting (Jacksonville? Oakland would’ve been perfect had Jeff Garcia not signed). And that’ll never happen as long as Brady is healthy. And they aren’t going to pay what I would imagine, even in Vick’s current NFL state, will be a decent chunk of change for a backup QB.

Oh, and P.S.? Vick’s really not that good. Sure he’s fun to watch and is (or probably still is) an all-timer as an athlete, but as a QB he’s maybe average at best. His career passer rating is 75.7, tied with Wade Wilson and J.P. Losman.

But what makes this interesting is that there may come a time when the Patriots will want to take a chance on someone with baggage in Vick Territory. And if Belichick is still running the show and wants to bring in a guy like that, then it’s going to happen. Remember that he won’t arrive at the decision lightly, there will be plenty of risk vs. reward debate (though I don’t know with whom -- with Scott Pioli gone, I do wonder if Belichick trusts anyone enough to be swayed another way) and, yes, character will play a big factor. But the biggest question of all will be right one, in this business of sport:

Will he help us win?

And that is what Bill Belichick cares about most.

And if that bothers you, well, he’s earned the right to tell you what Bob Dylan once told me.

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Contact Kirk Minihane at kminihane@weei.com