I don't know how else to put it, so I'll just say it as simply as I can.

It seems that Roger Goodell went into his chambers, crunched the numbers and decided that four games is ample punishment for buying a couple of 20-year-old girls some alcohol. 

Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. I just don't know how he figured it out. Could be he has a chart similar to the one that shows general managers how many points each draft pick is worth when weighing a potential trade.

But I suppose there must be some system.

Donte' Stallworth drives drunk and kills someone. He is arrested and convicted. 

Goodell suspended him for an entire season. 

Choosing to drive a car while drunk, and then ending the life of a husband and father is, by the Commish's math, exactly four times worse than buying booze for college girls. I don't know if that's right or wrong, I just would love to know how one comes to that conclusion.

Before you start with the outrage, I'm not trying to lessen the evils of Ben Roethlisberger. Roger Goodell is. According to Goodell, the suspension of Roethlisberger has nothing to do with the possibility that he may have raped a college student in Milledgeville, Georgia. These are his words, not mine.

This is from the letter Goodell sent to Roethlisberger on Wednesday:

"I recognize that the allegations in Georgia were disputed and that they did not result in criminal charge being filed against you. My decision today is not based on a finding that you violated Georgia law, or on a conclusion that differs from that of the local prosecutor."

So Goodell, according to the quote above, appears not to disagree with the Ocmulgee District Attorney, who felt that "the overall circumstance did not lead to a viable prosecution. We do not prosecute morals. We prosecute crimes."

In other words, it appears to be two people of adult age having consensual sex. In a public place, yes, but not rape. Now whether that is true or not is of course another matter, but it can't be one for the Commissioner of the NFL to solve, right? Isn't that a little above his pay grade? Shouldn't he be worried about a new building in Jacksonville or making sure he knows how pronounce the name "Ndamukong Suh?"

Guess not. Looks like Goodell has an Andy Sipowitz streak. He has to get the bad guy, even if the law has already taken a look and moved on. Maybe Goodell is actually more like Dexter Morgan, minus the whole serial killer thing. Making right out of wrong.

And knowing that he couldn't suspend Roethlisberger for a crime that he wasn't even arrested for, Goodell found the one illegal act that all parties agreed occurred that night and made it stick. 

"As the District Attorney concluded, the extensive investigatory record shows that you contributed to the irresponsible consumption of alcohol by purchasing [or facilitating the purchase of] alcoholic beverages for underage college students, at least some of whom were likely intoxicated. The Personal Conduct Policy makes clear that that I may impose discipline 'even when the conduct does not result in the conviction of a crime' as, for example, where the conduct 'imposes inherent danger to the safety and well being of another person."

Are we really buying that Goodell would have given any player in the NFL a potential six-game suspension for purchasing jello shots for college students? Come on, Roger, stop hiding behind the language and tell us what you really think. This is the first time in your reign as Commish that a player has been suspended without an arrest, failed drug test or criminal charge. What makes this case so special?

And where does the line for the Personal Conduct Policy begin and end? Would having a child out of wedlock qualify? How about failing to pay for child support? Protesting a war? If Tiger Woods wasn't the world's best golfer but a safety for the Seahawks would he have been suspended for having multiple martial infidelities?

How did the Players Union ever agree to such a policy? It must have been done in exchange for guaranteed contracts and extraordinary measures to prevent concussions. What a gutless, spineless group the Players Union is in the NFL.  Time and time again the owners play Rob Lowe to the players' Mare Winningham. That's right, a "St. Elmo's Fire" reference in what should be a serious column. Shoot me.

Bottom line is that Goodell smelled a public relations disaster and acted quickly.  And in doing so he set a hideous precedent. No arrest. No charges filed. No chance for a jury to hear all the evidence from both sides, a public process to find the truth. None of that. 

Now I don't know if Roethlisberger is innocent or guilty of rape. But I'm not ready to convict him based solely on the accounts of college girls that were admittedly drunk that evening. I would prefer to let 12 of his peers sit in a room and listen to hours of testimony from each side, then go into another room and debate innocence or guilt.

Not a flawless system, I know, but it's worked pretty well so far. Does anyone have a better plan?

I mean other than Roger Goodell, chief of morality police.

The problem, of course, will be when an innocent man is suspended. And that will happen at some point. Last time I looked Goodell was a human being. He'll screw one up. You think NCAA President Roger Goodell would not have suspended the Duke lacrosse players in 2006?

Oh, and am I the only one that finds it more than a little suspicious that all five Steelers prime-time games are scheduled for after Roethlisberger's return? If he gets the six games his first game back would be -- brace for shock -- a Sunday Night NBC contest at New Orleans? Think NBC will promote the return angle much? And the game will get huge rating and that means eventually more money for the owners and the league and even Roger Goodell, chief of morality police. 

Now I have no use for Ben Roethlisberger as a person. He is, by almost every account, an obnoxious, arrogant loudmouth who feels entitled to whatever he wants. He surrounds himself with morons and yes men. A lousy human being at best, it would seem. I wish him nothing but misery. And it certainly is fair to question whether or not he has a problem with alcohol. And, yes, if you put the proverbial gun to my head I think I'd have to say that he probably violated the law in Georgia that night. 

But I don't know if he did. Only two people do, and Roger Goodell isn't one of them.  

And all the power in the world isn't going make that change.