If things don't work out for the 2012 Red Sox -- and I'm not saying they won't, just allowing for the possibility -- I think I already know who a main goat will be. 

Last Friday morning in Fort Myers, Bobby Jenks -- fresh off a 2011 season in which he was paid $6 million to appear in 19 games with a 6.32 ERA and 2.23 WHIP -- was arrested for DUI after crashing into a pair of cars in the parking lot of a strip club. He's on the 60-day DL and very probably will never throw another pitch in a Red Sox uniform. So here's what $12 million looks like:

Combined wins, saves and holds with the Red Sox: Four

Combined DL stints and arrests: Five

A bust with a bust. 

On Tuesday we learned from Joe Maddon that the Rays were aware of Carl Crawford's wrist issues over the last half-decade or so. Crawford told Rob Bradford last week that he's been taking shots in his left wrist for the last five years. So the Red Sox -- with no real competition for his services, at least at the eventual price -- spent $140 over seven years for a player that had exactly one top 10 MVP finish in nine seasons with the Rays AND had significant wrist issues? Shrewd. 

And now Crawford -- coming off a horrific 2011 season, as poor an offensive season as any by a Sox starting outfielder in franchise history; of the 73 eligible players last season he was 70th in OBP in the American League -- will start the 2012 season in Florida with (wait for it) inflammation in his surgically repaired left wrist. But he's been able to fight off the pain just enough to tell everyone in Fort Myers with a notebook or tape recorder that he can't hit sixth or seventh in the lineup this season, he needs to be at the top of the order. I would submit that maybe Mr. Crawford should keep his mouth shut and actually produce before making requests, but when you've got six years and $120 million (guaranteed) left on your contact I suppose there is a serious sense of entitlement. 

We heard from Maddon about eight hours or so after John Lackey checked in with the media for the first time in 2012. Talking to Dan Shaughnessy, Lackey finally stepped up and put an end to the beer and controversy story. A note to the young athletes out there -- this is how you win them over.

"Guys having a beer after their start has been going on for the last 100 years. This is retarded."

Look, I'm not going to pretend that I've never used the word "retarded" -- I hate when media guys take the moral high ground; if you've ever spent 15 minutes in a press box you know how disingenuous that would be -- but Lackey simply has to know better. This was his chance to come clean, to make his case and he completely blew it. Too bad Marco Scutaro isn't around, Lackey could've blamed him for the gaffe. I was frankly surprised that the Globe used the word, but I don't blame the editors. It's amazing -- Lackey has literally done nothing right since he arrived here two years ago. He was the worst pitcher in baseball last year, which is no small feat on its own. But to pull it off while making more money than any pitcher in Red Sox history is almost breathtakingly awful stuff. 

Oh, and there was an established injury concern with Lackey, same as Crawford. The Red Sox knew about Lackey's elbow problems, were so aware that they tied a clause into his $82.5 million contract that states if he has Tommy John surgery the team has an option for a sixth year at the MLB minimum. And yes, Lackey has been so pathetic in his two seasons with the Red Sox that it is without dispute that he will be paid $15.2 million this year not to throw a single pitch is good news. 

Jenks, Crawford, Lackey. About a quarter of a billion dollars worth of contacts, and absolutely zero production to date. 

And the guy who signed the three to these deals is gone. Theo Epstein can quote Bill Walsh and the need for a fresh start until he's 100 years old and no one is buying it. Larry Luchhino won the war and Theo was forced to retreat to Chicago (though the $20 million contract helps with the wounds, I suppose). 

When the dust is settled and temperatures return to normal, his ultimate legacy will be the Man Who Ended The Curse, but right now Epstein is just the guy who left this team in a hell of a mess. There is, quite simply, no way to escape the Lackey contract. The Red Sox are stuck. And we all expect Crawford to return to the form that made him an overpaid at $20 million a year but still highly productive player. But if this wrist injury lingers (possible), or if the pressure of Boston is too much, this could be a historically lousy contract.

And no one wants to hear this and I get why, I really do, but there is a budget for this team. So when Jacoby Ellsbury signs with the Diamondbacks or Yankees or Cubs (how great would that be?) don't blame Larry Lucchino or John Henry or Ben Cherington. That'll be Theo's fault. He chose to give the money to Crawford instead, he clearly didn't believe in Ellsbury (Mike Cameron is just more proof). And John Lackey meant no Roy Halladay or Cliff Lee. That's how it goes.

So if the Sox are struggling in June, feel free to rip Bobby Valentine or Ben Cherington or the players or owners or anyone else involved with the organization. 

But don't forget about the guy in Chicago. He'll still be in the honeymoon period there, but his free agent disasters over his final couple of years will be felt all season in Boston.

As long as John Lackey and Carl Crawford are collecting paychecks, Theo Epstein's impact remains very much alive for the Sox. And that's something Larry Lucchino can't make go away.