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About Jerry Thornton

Jerry Thornton appears daily as the third man in on The Dale & Holley Show and is the author of the Thornography blog on WEEI.com. In addition, Jerry is a standup comic who won the Boston Comedy Riot competition and has worked colleges and clubs all around New England. He has appeared on HBO's Emmy Award-winning "Curse of the Bambino" and Comcast Sports New England and has written for ColdHardFootballFacts.com. Prior to coming to WEEI full-time, Jerry was a writer for BarstoolSports.com.

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MOST RECENT COLUMNS
12/01/14 09:54 EST
Things to consider while realizing if Kim Kardashian's bare ass broke the Internet, the sight of Gronk's would have destroyed it: -- Every time the Patriots lose it's supposed to be footballmageddon around here, with fire and brimstone raining from the sky, rivers and seas boiling, human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, etc. etc. How did Tom Brady put it back in September? It becomes a quality-of-life issue for us. And as always, he was spot on. But this game is the exception. That rare loss you can live with without the Mass(achusetts) hysteria. Against a solid team that dominates at home to the point it had won its last four games in Green Bay by an average margin of 32 points, you lose by one score, hold this team to three points in the second half and you were one or two plays away from stealing a win? And the loss is outside the conference? I'm all about us not doing the moral victory thing in these parts, but this is one where your pets don't need to be checking Craigslist
11/24/14 08:03 EST
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Things to consider while admitting that these salutes to the troops, missing-man formation flyovers and the U.S. Marine color guard are a form of video pepper spray every, single time: -- I suppose by now we've moved beyond talking about the doubters, correct? It's safe to say that the anti-Patriots zealots and grudge-holders who were ready to bathe in the team's blood back in September no longer are germane to the discussion now that the Pats have pulled off yet another dominating win over yet another division leader? I mean, you can only string together so many “statement wins” before those statements assemble themselves into a soliloquy. And at this point they've formed the frigging St. Crispin's Day speech that should expose the guys who were saying this championship era is over for the trolling, click-baiting frauds they are, once and for all. -- Statements wins don't get any louder and clearer than this one. Coming in, Detroit had the undisputed best defense in football.
11/17/14 12:57 EST
Things to consider as I take Knee-Jerk Reactions to WEEI.com. Same grammatical mistakes. Same wildly misinformed football analysis. All-new location! -- This is yet another in a long string of bad weeks for the anti-Patriots cyberbullies. The professional panic lobby that has been grumbling that the Pats are squandering Brady's final years wake up today to them sitting on a TWO-game lead in the AFC. The Andrew Luck fanboys who raced to anoint him and the Colts The Next Big Thing do the math and find that in three meetings the Pats have outscored them 144-66. The shrill naysayers who griped they were only beating up tomato cans just watched them blow out the top two teams in the conference. And the hysterical nincompoops who screamed about the Patriots not giving Brady any “weapons” have to come to grips with the fact that they've scored more points than Indy or Denver and are seven behind Green Bay for the league lead. -- If you're one of those rabid Patriots haters, you must
02/01/12 01:40 EST
Four years ago this week leading up to the Super Bowl That Shall Not Be Named, I published an article in the paper edition of Barstool Sports about how I hate the New York Giants, why I hate the Giants, the depth of my hatred for the Giants, the way I grew up hating the Giants and all the different ways I hate the Giants. It was all about growing up in New England in how I've had to tolerate living in the shadow of Big Blue my whole life.Surrounded by older guys like my friends' dads who rooted for the Giants before there was a Patriots and passed that insufferable trait along to my friends. And how for my whole life we've been subjected to Giants games in the Boston TV market each and every damned Sunday the Pats aren't on. How every day they've ever lost a game was a good day for me, even times when they were losing double-digit games a year. And how the time Joe Pisarcik coughed it up at the end to cost them the game against Philly is one of the happiest, most vivid memories of my very



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