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About Jerry Thornton

Jerry Thornton is a standup comic who has been working the New England comedy club circuit since back when Tiger Woods was passing very dirty notes in grade school. He won the Boston Comedy Riot competition, appeared in HBO's "Curse of the Bambino," has written for Cold, Hard Football Facts.com and is a frequent co-host of the Planet Mikey Show. Jerry also can be read daily on BarstoolSports.com, writing under the very imaginative online pseudonym "Jerry Thornton."

 
COLUMNS
Jerry Thornton
04/07/2010 - 12:06am
I waited my whole life for someone to come along, buy the Red Sox, and accomplish two things: 1) Win championships. And, 2) Clean up the decrepit, tenement slum that was Fenway Park.
Jerry Thornton
03/31/2010 - 6:52am
It’s often said that race is the third rail of politics. And since that’s the place where race actually was meant to be addressed, then dealing with the issue in a wise-assy, fan-oriented sports column is pretty much the equivalent of climbing into the bathtub, sitting down in the water and deciding it would be a good place to start heating up some Toaster Strudels.
Jerry Thornton
03/24/2010 - 7:21am
Last Thursday’s Bruins-Pittsburgh matchup was one of those rare moments in sports that comes along maybe once a year, if you’re lucky. And even then, only if your team is relevant.
Jerry Thornton
03/16/2010 - 7:47pm
Last week in this space, I wrote a column called “The Geeks Will Inherit the Earth.” The premise of the piece can be summed up in a few simple sentences.
Jerry Thornton
03/10/2010 - 1:27am
Anyone who knows me will tell you I’m wildly, consistently and preternaturally optimistic about the Red Sox, especially this time of year.
Jerry Thornton
03/03/2010 - 12:05am
What just took place between hockey and me has probably happened to every one of us at one time or another.
Jerry Thornton
02/24/2010 - 12:13am
I would like to apologize to everyone. That’s not to say I feel like I have anything to apologize for. Nor am I under the delusion anyone cares enough about what I do or say to expect an apology. I mean what I said quite literally. I would like to apologize. To everyone. Just because I think it would be fun.
Jerry Thornton
02/17/2010 - 12:30am
I might be the only guy in Boston who’s man enough to admit this publicly, but I’m watching the Winter Olympics. And I mean hours and hours of the Winter Olympics. You know how much time your lazy 14-year-old son squanders playing “Halo 3”? That’s how much time I’m spending in front of the Olympic coverage.
Jerry Thornton
02/10/2010 - 8:02am
“It is not enough that I should succeed.  Others must fail.” — Broadway producer David Merrick
Jerry Thornton
02/03/2010 - 2:09am
Generally speaking, I’m a pretty mainstream guy. I tend to like the things the general public likes. I eat at chain restaurants. Buy clothes at outlet stores. Drive a cheap, ordinary make and model of car. Watch the shows everyone is talking about.
Jerry Thornton
01/27/2010 - 2:16am
When you think about it, we didn’t have to become sports fans. Nobody put a gun to our head and forced us.
Jerry Thornton
01/21/2010 - 8:43am
When you’re a sports blogger and you’re aware of the fact that your target demographic is (slightly) younger than you, you think twice before you write anything that says things were better back in the day.
Jerry Thornton
01/14/2010 - 9:49am
I was at a party over the holidays where someone raised one of those deep, existential questions that only seem to come up late at night after polishing off a couple of plastic bottles of discount store-brand scotch and a cheese ball with the size (and destructive power) of the Death Star. And that question was:


Audio On Demand

Patriots Coach Bill Belic…

Patriots Coach Bill Belichick with Dale and Holley

We sit down with Bill Belichick on a Patriots Monday and get his take on a nail-biting win over the Jets, as well as his feelings on Peyton Manning breaking the NFL record for touchdowns.

Vince Wilfork with Dale and Holley

We check in with Big Vince on a Patriots Monday. Vince sounds like he's fighting a cold but swears he'll be good to go come Sunday. Vince tells Dale and Holley that their defense will have to be better if they expect to keep winning, especially against the ground game.

Tedy Bruschi with Dale and Holley

Full Tilt, Full Time #54 Tedy Bruschi talks to Dale and Holley about a record breaking night for Peyton Manning, and a tough win for the Patriots this past Thursday.

We Hate Dwyane Wade - Kir…

We Hate Dwyane Wade - Kirk Minihane Previews the Celtics

Kirk Minihane joins the We Hate Dwyane Wade Show to preview the upcoming Celtics season. Ben and Sam also discuss the Rajon Rondo/Jeff Green trade rumors and dabble in the classic NBA analytics debate.

NWOA Injury Report - Rajon Rondo

Dr Nick Leung for the Newton Wellesley Orthopedics Association joins Ben to talk about Rajon Rondo's broken hand.

We Hate Dwyane Wade - 10-1-14

The debut edition of the We Hate Dwyane Wade show. Ben and Sam preview the Celtics and talk about other summer news around the NBA.

Joe Castiglione wraps up …

Joe Castiglione wraps up the 2014 Red Sox Season with a Poem

Joe Castiglione does his annual wrap-up of the season by reading the poem by Bart Giamatti.

Mut and Bradford on the disappointing season for Jackie Bradley, Jr and Xander Bogaerts 9-28-14

Mut and Rob discuss the "kids" and the variety of young bodies the Red Sox called upon this season. Specifically, they look at Bogaerts and Bradley, Jr. and where things went wrong. They give their opinions on which one will right the ship next season.

Minor Details Ep. 101: Red Sox director of player development Ben Crockett on the state of the Red Sox system

Description: Red Sox farm director Ben Crockett looks back at the 2014 Red Sox prospect season by answering listener questions about a number of Red Sox prospects as well as broader issues and themes in the farm system.

Tony Marinaro from TSN 69…

Tony Marinaro from TSN 690 in Montreal yells about Bruins-Habs 10-17-14

The world's biggest Canadiens fan Tony Marinaro joins MFB after the Bruins and Tuukka Rask suffered another loss in Montreal.

Jack Edwards with Dale and Holley

We check in with NESN's Jack Edwards for a Bruins-Canadiens preview, live from French-Quebec.

Pierre McGuire, NBC: Bruins have had horrible early schedule. 10-16-14

Pierre McGuire joins MFB to analyze last night's Bruins-Red Wings game and preview tonight's game against the Canadiens. Pierre also offers his take on fighting in the NHL.

Tom Brady on Peyton Manni…

Tom Brady on Peyton Manning's touchdown record 10-20-14

Tom Brady discussed Peyton's record breaking night.

Tim Hasselbeck on Manning vs. Brady 10-20-14

Tim Hasselbeck on Peyton vs. Brady.

Peyton Manning breaks Favre's touchdown record 10-20-14

The guys opened the show discussing Peyton Manning's record setting night in Denver.

Christian's Top 5 Coaches…

Christian's Top 5 Coaches in the NFL, 10-20-14

Christian talks about his Top 5 coaches in the NFL.

Three For All - Christian has poisoned himself

Christian learns a thing or two about lead poisoning. San Francisco hates Lorde until the World Series is over. Floyd Mayweather sued for false imprisonment.

Chris "Dwight Stone" Jones, talks about blocking the late FG Thursday night, 10-20-14

Patriots DT Chris Jones wasn't even sure he was the one who blocked NIck Folk's FG attempt to seal the win against the Jets. He also talked about how well LB Dont'a Hightower has done in place of Jerod Mayo.

Tedy Bruschi: I recognize…

Tedy Bruschi: I recognize the greatest of Manning, but I'm still going with Tom

Full Tilt, Full Time #54 Tedy Bruschi talks to Dale and Holley about a record breaking night for Peyton Manning, and a tough win for the Patriots this past Thursday.

Bill Belichick (wryly): It's comforting to know Manning has thrown more TD's against us than anyone

We sit down with Bill Belichick on a Patriots Monday and get his take on a nail-biting win over the Jets, as well as his feelings on Peyton Manning breaking the NFL record for touchdowns.

Vince Wilfork: We just couldn't get off the field on third down

We check in with Big Vince on a Patriots Monday. Vince sounds like he's fighting a cold but swears he'll be good to go come Sunday. Vince tells Dale and Holley that their defense will have to be better if they expect to keep winning, especially against the ground game.

10 Years since the Red So…

10 Years since the Red Sox began their comeback and eventual World Series Championship

Mikey, Villani and Lenny are talking about the 2004 Red Sox on the anniversary of Game 4 of the ALCS with Dave Roberts steal abd Bill Mueller driving him in and what it was like to witness.

The Patriots record during the regular season and Super Bowl

Mikey, Mut and Lenny are talking about the Patriots and how they have stacked up through the years and what got them to the three championships and five Super Bowl appearances in the Brady-Belichick era.

Bill Belichick and the Patriots Draft History

Mikey and Mut take a call from someone who wants to criticize Belichick the GM and his history of drafting players and making moves in the draft.

The Fantasy Football Hour…

The Fantasy Football Hour with Jim Hackett and Pete Davidson - Week 7, 10-19-14

This week Pete gives the listeners a brief, but enthusiastic history lesson the ineptitude of the New York Jets. They also help you set your final rosters for your Week 7 fantasy teams.

SoccerCast - Revs March to the Playoffs

Predictions for the Revs moving into the playoffs, Jurgen Klinsmann vs Don Garber, and Ben needs a new European team to root for.

We Hate Dwyane Wade - Kirk Minihane Previews the Celtics

Kirk Minihane joins the We Hate Dwyane Wade Show to preview the upcoming Celtics season. Ben and Sam also discuss the Rajon Rondo/Jeff Green trade rumors and dabble in the classic NBA analytics debate.

Tom Brady on Peyton Manni…

Tom Brady on Peyton Manning's touchdown record 10-20-14

Tom Brady discussed Peyton's record breaking night.

More from this show

Tim Hasselbeck on Manning…

Peyton Manning breaks Fav…

Peyton Manning breaks Favre's touchdown record 10-20-14

The guys opened the show discussing Peyton Manning's record setting night in Denver.

More from this show

Peyton Manning breaks the…

Peyton Manning breaks the all-time TD record, 10-20-14

Peyton Manning broke another record last night, which obviously started the Brady/Manning debate. We hear from Tim Hasselbeck, Tom Brady, and talk about who has had the better career.

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NFL Sunday - Around the N…

NFL Sunday - Around the NFL, 10-19-14

Mut and Chris Price go Around the NFL and take a look at ALL the games today and one tomorrow.

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