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About Jerry Thornton

Jerry Thornton appears daily as the third man in on The Dale & Holley Show and is the author of the Thornography blog on WEEI.com. In addition, Jerry is a standup comic who won the Boston Comedy Riot competition and has worked colleges and clubs all around New England. He has appeared on HBO's Emmy Award-winning "Curse of the Bambino" and Comcast Sports New England and has written for ColdHardFootballFacts.com. Prior to coming to WEEI full-time, Jerry was a writer for BarstoolSports.com.

 
COLUMNS
Jerry Thornton
12/01/2014 - 10:54am
Things to consider while realizing if Kim Kardashian's bare ass broke the Internet, the sight of Gronk's would have destroyed it:
Jerry Thornton
11/24/2014 - 9:03am
Things to consider while admitting that these salutes to the troops, missing-man formation flyovers and the U.S. Marine color guard are a form of video pepper spray every, single time:
Jerry Thornton
11/17/2014 - 1:57pm
Things to consider as I take Knee-Jerk Reactions to WEEI.com. Same grammatical mistakes. Same wildly misinformed football analysis. All-new location!
Jerry Thornton
02/01/2012 - 2:40am
Four years ago this week leading up to the Super Bowl That Shall Not Be Named, I published an article in the paper edition of Barstool Sports about how I hate the New York Giants, why I hate the
Jerry Thornton
01/18/2012 - 1:23am
“A mind that is anxious about the future is miserable.” -- Roman philosopher Seneca the Younger “Do not sit in the corner and sulk. It draws attention a negative way. Draw attention to yourself, but in a positive way.” -- Wedding Crashers Rule No. 6
Jerry Thornton
01/04/2012 - 1:36am
It turns out reports of the death of the Patriots Way were greatly exaggerated.
Jerry Thornton
12/21/2011 - 10:35am
One man’s annual countdown of the biggest miscreants, jerks, psychos, losers, mental defectives, morons, habitual criminal offenders, dirtbags and nitwits of the year: 10. The Miami Heat
Jerry Thornton
12/07/2011 - 1:11am
You know, you’d think that with us not being all that far removed from the days when Boston was “Loserville,” we’d all just be able to appreciate winning just for its own sake. That we wouldn’t worry about the manner in which we won or style points or any of that nonsense. That only the scoreboard would matter.
Jerry Thornton
11/23/2011 - 2:32am
It’s gone without saying all season that the Patriots pass defense hasn’t been very good. In fact since they came out of the gate, the Pats have been called the consensus worst defense in the NFL --  32nd in the league against the pass, 32nd in the league overall. 
Jerry Thornton
11/09/2011 - 1:26am
Despite the fact that I’m an unapologetic Patriots homer, I have to confess that like most people, I, too, am starting to have serious concerns about where this team is headed.
Jerry Thornton
10/25/2011 - 10:52pm
“Lost in the cacophony of the last few weeks is the fact that the Boston Red Sox remain one of the preeminent organizations in baseball, with an extremely bright future.
Jerry Thornton
10/14/2011 - 1:08pm
I've always considered there to be seven categories of pro sports athletic achievement. In ascending order of accomplishment: -- All-Star/Pro Bowler -- First Team All-Star/All-Pro -- League MVP -- Team Hall/Wall/Ring of Fame -- Hall of Famer -- Number Retired -- Statue Worthy
Jerry Thornton
09/28/2011 - 12:18am
The month of September has been one of the worst in recent memories for the Boston sports fan. The Red Sox are on the verge of what might end up being the worst late-season implosion in baseball history. The Patriots blew a 21-0 lead in Buffalo.
Jerry Thornton
09/14/2011 - 8:36pm
Shameless Patriots fanboy that I am, I have a Pats postgame routine that I follow. When they win a game, particularly when they win big the way they did Monday night in Miami, I stick around afterward and watch as much of the wrap-up and analysis as I possibly can.
Jerry Thornton
09/02/2011 - 10:50am
Let's start with a quiz. The category is Boston sports and the media.
Jerry Thornton
08/18/2011 - 12:23am
When it comes to women, every guy has a “type.” Greater minds than mine — from Aristotle to DaVinci to Hugh Hefner — have pondered the question “What is beauty?” and not come up with an objective answer. But there’s no question that different guys go for different things. I go for Kate Beckinsale. You like Kate Bosworth.
Jerry Thornton
08/04/2011 - 10:44pm
New Patriots defensive tackle Albert Haynesworth is one of those players you could describe by saying (spins the cliché wheel): “His troubles are well documented.” At least I can say it because I spend a good chunk of time last year documenting them. Well, I hope.
Jerry Thornton
07/20/2011 - 12:55am
Confession time. I’m sure those of you who’ve read my column before, heard me on WEEI and watched the Fanthropology videos I’ve done for this site just naturally assume I’m about the most suave, sophisticated guy in Boston.
Jerry Thornton
07/06/2011 - 9:31am
Let's be honest: Sportswise, this isn't shaping up to be the best summer ever. Maybe it's just the post-Stanley Cup hangover talking. Moving past the hockey season is proving to be one of those half-a-bottle-of-Bayer-plus-some-hair-of-the-dog brain killer.
Jerry Thornton
06/29/2011 - 11:00am
Without a doubt, “tradition” is one of the most grossly overused words in the English language. We use it to describe everything from the changing of the guards at the Tomb of the Unknowns to the mayor of Punxsutawny pulling a giant rat out of the ground every February 2nd.
Jerry Thornton
06/22/2011 - 12:28am
“Boston loves a winner. And will not tolerate a loser. Bostonians play to win all the time. I wouldn’t give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed ... because the very thought of losing is hateful to Massholes.” --Patton (edited somewhat by me)
Jerry Thornton
06/07/2011 - 11:57pm
That peculiar sound you’ve been hearing the last month-and-a-half or so has been the anguished sound of a generation of Boston sports media having to re-acquaint themselves with how to pay attention to the Bruins. It’s been a great disturbance in the Force. As if dozens of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced into writing Bruins game reports.
Jerry Thornton
05/25/2011 - 8:54am
Like I’ve admitted here before, I’m new to this business of being all wrapped up in the Bruins. Or to put it more accurately, I’m one of the hundreds of thousands of Bostonians who followed the Bruins closely but eventually jumped ship.
Jerry Thornton
05/11/2011 - 12:33am
Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the seminar. I’m handing out the information packet we’ll be using, so if you could just take one and pass the rest to person behind you, we can get started.
Jerry Thornton
04/27/2011 - 5:43am
Somehow, you just knew from the puck drop in Game 1 that “Bruins-Canadiens Part XXXIII: This Time, It's Personal” was going to come down to a Game 7. And while I have every hope and faith it's going to go well Wednesday night and the Bruins will move on, it's still worth pointing out that I'd rather be us than them.


Audio On Demand

NFL Sunday - the offseaso…

NFL Sunday - the offseason edition - with Greg Dickerson and Chris Price -- HOUR #2 -- 3-29-15

Greg and Chris talk with Mike Reiss from ESPN Boston in hour 2 of NFL Sunday to discuss a variety of offseason happenings with the Pats and throughout the league. Greg and Chris also get into the NFL Draft and where Mariota and Winston will go.

Mike Reiss, ESPN Boston/ESPN NFL Nation, joins DIckerson and Price on NFL Sunday 3-29-15

Mike Reiss calls the guys to talk about the offseason news for the Pats. He talks about the Pats/Jets tampoering fiasco, free agency, where he sees Ridley and Connolly ending up, if the Patriots would be interested in Reggie Wayne and more.

NFL Sunday - the offseason edition - with Greg Dickerson and Chris Price -- HOUR #1 -- 3-29-15

In the first hour of the show, Greg and Chris discuss the news coming out of the owners' meetings this week and rule changes. Belichick's blow-up over the league not wanting to spend on endzone cameras was well documented and the guys react. They also talk about the Jets ridiculous tampering charges, free agents still lingering out there, where Stevan Ridley will land and the RB position in New England. Dickerson and Price briefly discuss the adventures of Tom Brady before being joined by WEEI.com's Mike Petraglia to talk all things Pats in the offseason.

We Love Anthony Davis - C…

We Love Anthony Davis - Celtics Playoff Push, 3-25-15

Brow Buff's Sam Packard and Ben Kichen break down Marcus Smart's unfortunate ball tap, debate leadership in the Celtics locker room, and rehash the great Kevin Love to Boston rumors.

SB Nation's Paul Flannery joins Mike Mutnansky, 2-19-15

Flannery joins Mut to break down the Isaiah Thomas trade to Boston and what it means for the Celtics this season and in the future. Paul also chats with Mut about the other deals that happened at the NBA's trading deadline

SI's Chris Mannix with Dale and Holley

We talk to Chris Mannix from SI to break down the C's acquisition of Isaiah Thomas and the crazy trade deadline in the rest of the NBA.

Red Sox Assistant GM Mike…

Red Sox Assistant GM Mike Hazen with Joe Castiglione and Alex Speier in the booth

Joe and Alex talked with the Sox AGM about the state of the team as Opening Day approaches.

Hot Stove Show 03-26-15

Mut, Tomase, and Bradford kick things off talking about Shane Victorino taking offense to people reading into some comments he made about trading for Cole Hamels. They also discuss Blake Swihart and how soon he could be up if Christian Vazquez starts the season on the DL.

Joe Kelly talks about his biceps and brackets

Joe Kelly joined the Hot Stove show where he talked about being ready for his next spring training start after a biceps ailment forced him out of his last outing, he talks about his NCAA brackets and how teammate Wade Miley has a perfect bracket still.

Peter Chiarelli, Boston B…

Peter Chiarelli, Boston Bruins GM, joins DJ Bean, Joe McDonald and Pete Blackburn on Sunday Skate 3-29-15

Peter Chiarelli joined the Sunday Skate crew to talk about the Bruins playoff push heading into the final handful of games of the regular season. Chiarelli talked about avoiding some of the overly negative feedback he gets while realizing that the team does have real issues. He discusses what went down at the trade deadline and if he was happy with the outcome, Lucic having a down year and underperforming, the salary cap and if he considers it as big of an issue as it's been made out to be and what the future holds for the team.

Sunday Skate with WEEI's DJ Bean, ESPN Boston's Joe McDonald and Pete Blackburn -- HOUR #2 -- 3-29-15

It's a big hour #2 for the Sunday Skate dudes - they talk about the B's defenseman and what the future looks like at that position, with both moves the team can make and younger guys in the AHL. They also get into the Bruins philosophy on bringing guys up and sending them back down and how players deal with that. Finally, the boys are joined by Bruins GM Peter Chiarelli to discuss EVERYTHING.

unday Skate with WEEI's DJ Bean, ESPN Boston's Joe McDonald and Pete Blackburn -- HOUR #1 -- 3-29-15

The Sunday Skate crew gets the show going discussing the Bruins big, impressive victory over the NY Rangers yesterday. What can you take from that game? According to LB - Lyndon Byers - who called the guys from the road, not a lot. LB drops a dime on what was going on with the Rangers yesterday. DJ and Joe discuss Claude's lines and groupings and the importance of Ryan Spooner. They also get into Lucic, his contributions this year and if he can turn things around.

Headlines, Headlines, Hea…

Headlines, Headlines, Headlines: Justin Bieber roast 3-31-15

The top stories of the day as recounted by Kirk Minihane.

Indiana's Religious Freedom Restoration Act and the Final Four 3-31-15

The guys discussed the controversial Indiana law.

President Obama visits Boston 3-31-15

The guys opened the show by discussing the Presidents visit yesterday.

Upon Further Review - Hol…

Upon Further Review - Holley on the crossover, 3-31-15

Michael Holley comes in for the crossover, and continues the discussion with Tim over what will happen if the Patriots face any type of punishment for the deflated footballs in the AFCCG.

Tim and Lou argue over the Deflategate investigation, 3-31-15

With the Wells report seemingly wrapping up (we hope), Tim and Lou got to talking about possible fines and punishments the Patriots must face. It's possible that the Patriots will face a small fine, but should they take that laying down? The conversation brings out a little passion from BOTH sides.

Jackie MacMullan, ESPN Boston, talks about the Celtics playoff push, 3-31-15

Jackie Mac talks about the Celtics win over the Hornets last night and their chances of making the playoffs.

Robert Kraft testifies in…

Robert Kraft testifies in the Aaron Hernandez trial: response and reaction

Dale, Michael and Jerry Thornton discuss Robert Kraft's testimony and the Hernandez trial overall as it continues to unfold.

Dale and Holley's Final Drive 03-31-15

We wrap up the day with the best in sound that you may have missed from throughout the day.

David Pastrnak is quietly having a better rookie season than Tyler Seguin had

Dale, Michael and Jerry discuss 'Pasta' and his solid rookie year, and make a few statistical comparisons.

Chris Price joins Mike Mu…

Chris Price joins Mike Mutnansky

Chris Price joins Mut to talk about how Revis will heat up the Jets-Pats rivalry next season

Mut's rant over the Jets filing tampering charges

Mut opens his show talking about the New York Jets filing tampering charges on the Patriots

Lucy the Textress is back

Mikey, Mut, and Lucy are talking about all things New England sports, the Red Sox spring training, more Darrelle Revis and Jets talk, and some Bruins mixed in.

Wrestlecast - Wrestlemani…

Wrestlecast - Wrestlemania Rewind

Will Noonan joins Chris in the studio to review Wrestlemania and Raw.

D&C's Breaking Balls: Sausage is a loser 3-30-15

Dino, Gerry and Kirk talk about Kirk's massage and crap all over Sausage.

Wrestlecast: History of Wrestlemania part 3

Ben and Adam finish the odyssey that is the history of Wrestlemania. Wrestlemanias 21-30 are discussed and analyzed.

Shaughnessy vs. Ortiz 3-3…

Shaughnessy vs. Ortiz 3-30-15

The latest feud between Shank and Papi was discussed.

More from this show

Boston Police officer sho…

Boston Police officer shot, people protest cops.......3-30-15

The guys discussed the disgusting protests at the scene of Officer Moynihan's shooting.

More from this show

Headlines, Headlines, Hea…

Headlines, Headlines, Headlines: Bill Cosby heckled 3-30-15

The top stories of the day as recounted by Kirk Minihane.

More from this show

Sausage is a loser 3-30-1…

Sausage is a loser 3-30-15

Dino, Gerry and Kirk talk about Kirk's massage and crap all over Sausage.

More from this show

The "latest" on Deflatega…

The "latest" on Deflategate... when will we get a decision?

We listen in on Adam Shefter's deflategate report on NFL Live on ESPN, and discuss when we can expect this whole mess to come to a head.

More from this show

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